Chanting pranam-mantrHare Krishna! I am very happy to see you all here, in this remarkable place. And it is not random occurrence, that we ar our parikram from here, from Imlitala. We have school of japa meditation and in this place Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu Himself was teaching us how to chant japa. All the daysing here in Vraj, and it was just about ten days, He used to come here every day, used to sit under this three and chant: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. Srila Krisnadas Babaji Maharaja, who was a spiritual brother of Srila Prabhupada and a disciple of Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Maharaja, would come to this place, at sunset on every Ekadashi day, near Imlitala tree and until sunrise he would be chanting: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. 

The sound never disappears. According to sankhya philosophy the sound is eternal. This sound which was left here by Caitanya Mahaprabhu, by Krishnadas Babaji Maharaja and many other vaisnavas, coming here and chanting the Holy Names, this sound is still dwelling here and if we are very fortunate, we will hear this sound. Actually, this is reality, this is not a fairy tale. A person can listen or hear this sound by which everything is pervaded here, feel this vibration. Unfortunately, we are very gross and because of this gross nature of our perception we can understand only gross things and the more gross they are the better it is for us. But if we tune ourselves properly, our very consciousness has this capability to perceive subtle things. And we are here for this purpose, to tune, to submerge in the atmosphere of this place. And to get very deep samskara which will leave the trace in our life. Actually, people consider themselves free, people think that they are free, but there are no free people in this world. Everyone somehow or other is driven by their samskaras, by those imprints which are left in their consciousness, with the experience which they got. And everything what a person is doing, he is doing it only because of being the slave of this samskara. Sometimes people do not realize these samskaras, in childhood they experienced some suffering and then they forgot, but all their life is formed on the bases of these samskaras. They go to psychologist and psychologist is tangling up their childhood samskaras and make them apparent outwardly.  We are all the slaves of samskaras. And we are coming here, in the holy places to get true samskaras, which will make us truly liberated and as deeper these samskaras are, the better it is. I will talk today about it. Because what is bhava? Again, bhavathis is what we get on the basis of our samskaras. I will explain it more widely later, but I wanted to say that principally, theoretically if we tune accordingly, we can get very deep samskaras here.         

At the beginning I will tell you about this place in outwardly view point. Imlitala is an old tree counting many thousands of years; still its trunk is left here. When I first time came in Vrindavan, it was many years back, this tree was still on the stage of its blossoming power. This was a huge tamarind tree, you can consider it according to this trunk. All tamarind trees were cursed in Vrindavan by Srimati Radharani. And they were cursed because of this particular tree. In Vrindavan there is no Tamarind which gives ripe fruits, out of Vrajamandal Tamarinds are being ripened, giving their fruits, while in Vrindavan all the fruits fall dawn green, because once upon a time as the folklore says Srimati Radharani ran away from Rasa dance and stepped on the root of this tamarind tree and in Her disappointment She cursed this tamarind tree. And this is huge fortune to be cursed by Srimati Radharani. 

Recently I was told by one devotee who visited Varsana, he was with her daughter there. They went to Maan Mandir and pujari in Maan Mandir incessantly was watching at his daughter, then he bowed down unto her, brought some garland and something more and people were asking around what had happened: “This is amazingly fortunate living being, Srimati Radharani gave her a slap in the face, and she came here.” In his mystic vision, he saw how she got slap from Srimati Radharani, which is still decorating her cheek. So that this is a special tamarind tree, cursed by Srimati Radharani Herself. And I was fortunate to chant japa in the shade of this tree. Then, after some years Muslim neighbor decided that this tree was disturbing him and decided to cut the branch and when he touched this branch, blood came out of it. He started to beg for forgiveness but the tree was dried because of this aparadha. 

This is also very important lesson which we have to learn from the very beginning. Here in Holy Dham everything is alive. Trees are alive, not to say anything about dogs, monkeys. This is all the mercy of Srimati Radharani. They are personal servants of Vrinda Devi. They are serving here. We have to be very careful. This tree dried because of an offence. Because of the aparadha we ourselves lose very important experience. We recline ourselves. Now here is growing appendage of this tree, it is not the very same itself, but anyway the very original tree is covered here. And for many years long there was emptiness on this place. Caitanya Mahaprabhu came here, sitting here He was watching the waves of Yamuna and chanting japa, then this place was vacated and its publicity was recovered by a disciple of Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Goswami Thakura Maharaja, Bhakti Saranga Goswami Maharaja. He is the founder of this place. I wanted in the beginning to offer some credit to him and say some words about him. And these few words will be saying much. 

Bhakti Saranga Maharaja was a direct descendant of Nityananda Prabhu. In Gaudiya Vaishnava Sampradaya there are parivaras – groups of vaisnavas following one of the direct companions of the Lord Caitanya – Nityananda Parivara, Advaita parivar, Syamananda parivar, or Ganga Mata Goswamini Parivar, many many Parivaras and there are vamsas as well. Vamsas they are families, direct descendants, relatives of great devotees. And he was coming from Nityananda Vamsa. In his youth when he listened to Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Thakura first time, his words made such impression on him, that he left everything off and started to follow him, he became brahmachari and afterwards, when Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati left his body, he became a sanyasi. He was very educated person and a wonderful preacher and Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura Prabhupada entrusted him the mission, which was very dear to his heart – mission of preaching in the West. At the beginning he sent Bon Maharaja, Bon Maharaja was in Berlin, then in England. Then, after Bon Maharaja’s return, Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Maharaja sent Bhakti Saranga Goswami Maharaja to London. 

And there in London he passed through unbelievable difficulties for preaching. In the beginning he had some livelihood, he was staying in one hostel. Then he ran out of his money and he would spend nights in the park, on the bench. Practically he was dying out of hunger.  And once, when he was wandering in this park – please, listen very carefully – at this time he was not a very young person already, abandoned in this London he was wandering without any means for existence and looking at some of river-channel to his surprise he saw there a golden murti of Adhoksaja Vishnu – in London, in a park. Krishna Himself came to him in this form for his inspiration, for he was in absolute desperation, he did not know what to do and after this mark, after embracing Adhoksaja Visnu, he went back in the hostel where he used to stay and to his surprise he was said that there was a letter for him and the letter was from Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati. There was written in the letter: “I am sending you some money, do not worry, do not be alarmed.” 

He was a very sincere servant, disciple of Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati, and he was always protecting his honor from the different Goswamis of different castes who were sometimes attacking him. Once one person challenged him, for Gaudiya Math printed Srimad-Bhagavatam with the photos of Bhaktivinoda Thakura and Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati and one person came and said: “It is an offence, from where you have the right to print photos of common people, in Srimad-Bhagavatam which is the incarnation of Krishna Himself?” And then Bhakti Saranga Goswami Maharaja stood up with his whole growth, spread his shoulders and said: “I am a descendant of Nityananda Prabhu, do you acknowledge that?” They said: “We acknowledge.” – “So that, Nityananda Prabhu Himself is speaking through my lips now. I gave my whole life to Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati, I am his faithful servant and I know, that everything what he is doing, he is doing on behalf of Srimati Radharani, he is no one but outwardly manifestation of Srimati Radharani. Srimad-Bhagavatam is Krishna Himself without doubt, but Krishna is very happy when servants of Srimati Radharani are in there [book Bhagavatam], because they are always in Her heart. Do you agree with that?” They said: “Yes, we agree.” They asked for forgiveness to Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati. 

So he was the founder of this place, he was first from the disciples of Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati who was getting disciples, by his direct order, still in Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati’s life. And Srila Prabhupada’s sister Bhavatarini, Pisima, she got second initiation from Bhakti Saranga Goswami Maharaj. He was a good friend of Srila Prabhupada’s, his sister considered him as his spiritual master, although first initiation she was given by Bhaktisidhanta Saraswati Thakura, but the second initiation she got here. When she was with Srila Prabhupada in Vrindavan, she came here and listened katha, considered herself spiritual sister of all the followers of Bhakti Saranga Goswami Maharaj, who continue serving here, performing bhajan in this place. So, this place is special even in the point of view of this very recent story, but we came here certainly not only for this purpose. The major reason of our coming here is a lila which was played in this place 5000 years ago and which actually brought us here, if there were not this lila, we would just carry on living in our cities: in Moscow, in Petersburg, in Berlin, in Uryupinsk and in other wonderful places and we would not know anything about Imlital, About Yamuna, about Kesi-ghat. I will tell you now this Lila and want to imitate you not just for listening it, but for attempt to submerge in this lila. 

Vrindavan is a forest. Close your eyes and imagine, that you are sitting in the forest of Vrindavan, there is no riksas, cars are not signaling, motors are not riding. The forest, Yamuna, birds… This forest on the banks of Yamuna is very dear to Krishna, because here in the month of Kartik He started His Rasa Dance. Not far from here, there is Vamsi Vat, under Vamsi Vat He played astounding melody on His flute. When this melody came into the ears of Gopis and entering there it broke into their hearts, each of them felt: “Krishna is calling me.” And even they did not feel that, but each of them hearing the melancholic shrieking calling voice of this flute, were thinking: “If I do not go right now, Krishna will be dead.” Krishna put all the emotions of His love and all His pain of separation from the Gopis in the sound of this flute. This was their first meeting, their first real meeting. 

The condition before meeting is called purva-raga, and we will talk about it again and again during our parikramas. This purva-raga of Krishna it sounded in the song of His flute. The Gopis rushed to Him and Rasa dance began. And in some moment, we know that Srimati Radharani left this dance. Why? Because She did not like there. And why she did not like? Because She did not see unity there. Something good can happen when different people are adjusting on each other and their hearts start to beat in unison and in the very beginning when Rasa Dance had just started, each Gopi was thinking Herself: “I am in the center. I am the happiest. Krishna chose only me.” Because nobody could see that Krishna is dancing with everyone. Each of them were thinking: “Only with me. With no one else.” The only person who could see all others was Radhika, She saw, that Krishna was dancing to riffraff, anyway it seemed like that to Her. This is her view and we are Her followers, She turned away and went from there. And Krishna felt that instantly. Krishna who was dancing with each Gopi in many forms, then suddenly in shock, in suddenness He was gathered again in one form and left Rasa Dance. He began to search for Her everywhere. This dense forest, jungles… He started to walk on this moonlight, in the footpath looking for her footprints but He could not find anything anywhere, after passing the forest which is situated here He saw some places which remembered Him about Her, but She was not there. At last He went to the banks of Yamuna under this tamarind Tree, under this Imlitala and started to repeat: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… 

It is clear that there are many other things in our heart. Let us try to understand, even a little bit, even a little sparkle of what He was experiencing. You all have experienced the feeling of separation from the people who are dear to you, this sucking sadness, emptiness. He began to listen, He was listening how Yamuna is flowing its water and how its waves are lapping, He was listening to this sound and He heard how Yamuna was repeating: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… He started to listen birds’ song, how night birds were singing, and heard that they were singing the very same: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… Cicadas were chirring and He heard the sound in this chirring of the cicadas, what did He hear again? – Radhe Radhe Radhe… It seemed to Him, that all the Earth is repeating this name: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… And after that He also started to chant the very same: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… And at last He fainted, too strong feelings overwhelmed Him and He fainted. But His lips continued to whisper: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… Forest beasts who were around, running nearby began to smell His body and they heard that from His exhausted lips was flying this name: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… And animals also started to chant this name and soon the whole world was full of these vibrations, this name filled everything and Krishna, when He woke up occurred in this atmosphere which was filled with the Holy Name of Srimati Radharani, at this moment He felt: “I am Radha.” 

This radha-bhava or mood of Srimati Radharani entered His heart and due to this bhava the color of His body changed. At this time Radhika heard this sound: Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe, Radhe… She went to the place, where Krishna was and approaching this field where Krishna was sitting under the tamarind tree, She saw a surprising scene, She saw a golden figure, which looked like Krishna, but He was illuminated with golden color. And Krishna being in the mood of Srimati Radharani started to utter strange things. He was saying: “Where are you? Where have you disappeared? Where have you lost? I cannot see you anywhere. I am the most unfortunate woman.” In this mood He started to repeat the words which used to come from Radharani’s lips. And at last He, sitting here, under the tamarind tree, overwhelmed by Her mood, started to repeat the Holy Name of Krishna: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare… His hearwas standing on end, tears were coming from His eyes and He felt something in His heart, which He had never felt before. Emotion which He felt at this moment, He had never experienced before. Srimati Radharani was standing and watching this scene, She couldn’t believe Her eyes, but soon Krishna felt His attendance and in some level came back to His outward consciousness and opening His eyes He saw Her. And She asked Him: “Syam how can I understand that? I saw this golden figure which was chanting: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare.” Krishna explained to Her everything and at some moment He said: “In Kali Yuga I will come here accepting your mood and in Kali Yuga I will chant the Holy Names and with this Holy Names I will distribute love for Me.” Srimati Radharani was very surprised when She heard that. She said: “Will You come in Kali Yuga? Will You distribute your love? To Whom will you distribute love? Who in Kali Yuga will be qualified to feel love for You?” Krishna started thinking, He had never thought before who would be qualified in Kali Yuga. Then He started thinking, evaluated the situation a little bit and said: “Nobody will be qualified, that’s why everybody will chant: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare.” If there were someone qualified it would be possible to chose someone, but when there is nobody qualified, there is no question of choosing, that’s why it has to be given to everyone. Srimati Radhika’s hear was standing on end, She said: “Everyone will be chanting… How is it possible?” – “How is it possible? That’s you are asking me that? When this love overwhelms You, You want everyone to experience the same, isn’t it? You want to share this love to everyone. When love is dancing in your heart, You want everyone to dance out of love. When love is singing in Your heart, You want everyone to sing out of love, isn’t it?” And at this moment Radhika rushed to Krishna and embraced Him. And they merged in each other in this embrace. 

rādhā kṛṣṇa-praṇaya-vikṛtir hlādinī śaktir asmād

ekātmānāv api bhuvi purā deha-bhedaṁ gatau tau

caitanyākhyaṁ prakaṭam adhunā tad-dvayaṁ caikyam āptaṁ

rādhā-bhāva-dyuti-suvalitaṁ naumi kṛṣṇa-svarūpam

(CC Adi 1.5)

In other words here Krishna, under this tree, in some level first time felt a shadow of Srimati Radharani’s feelings. This desire to feel them completely occurred to Him and that’s why He came: radha-bhava dyuti suvalitam naumi krisna svarupam. I bow dawn unto Krishna, unto krishna–svarupa, Krishna Himself who has come as radha-bhava dyuti suvalitam, with radha-bhava and with the refulgent complexion of Her, who came as the Lord Caitanya: caitanyākhyaṁ prakaṭam adhunā tad-dvayaṁ caikyam – when Radha and Krishna merged together. 

In other words, this is the place from where sankirtana movement started. It is said that in the very moment when Radha and Krishna embraced each other, Srimati Radharani’s sakhis (friends) started singing: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare… And it was the first kirtan. So the first harinama sankirtana started here. We are now in the very fountainhead of Sri harinama sankirtana movement, when through the Holy names Krishna Himself is distributing to others love for Him. In the very moment, when this happened, Krishna felt radha-bhava and struck with this mood of Srimati Radharani He started chanting the Holy Names. As I already told you this desire came to Him for feeling this radha-bhava thoroughly. 

Svarupa Damodar Goswami is explaining these three desires which appeared in Krishna’s heart and we have to understand these desires very well, because we ourselves are the result of these desires. śrī-rādhāyāḥ praṇaya-mahimā kīdṛśo vānayaivā svādyo yenādbhuta-madhurimā kīdṛśo vā madīyaḥ saukhyaṁ cāsyā mad-anubhavataḥ kīdṛśaṁ veti lobhāt tad-bhāvāḍhyaḥ samajani śacī-garbha-sindhau harīnduḥ. Hari, harinduh – the moon of Lord Hari, as once upon a time the moon was born from the ocean after it’s being churned by the demigods, similarly Hari of the Lord Krishna came from the ocean of womb of mother Saci. tad-bhāvāḍhyaḥ samajani – He appeared decorated with these bhavas: tad-bhavadyah. And what are these bhavas? These are three bhavas or three desires, which are manifested together with bhava of Srimati Radharani. Three desires which He wanted to experience are: śrī-rādhāyāḥ praṇaya-mahimā kīdṛśo vānayaivā – what kind of love is Srimati Radharani’s love? What kind of love is She experiencing? 

Krishna was thinking: “Everything which exists in this world emanates from me, I give pleasure to everyone, I am the source of attraction or happiness of all living beings, whatever happiness a person is experiencing, He is experiencing this happiness because this is some kind of particle of happiness coming out from Me.” In Bhagavad-gita Krishna says that everything wonderful, beautiful what you can see, these are all sparkles of my splendor. Something is magnifying us in this world and all this is Krishna. Each and every happiness which we have, which we will have, which we might have, all this happiness is happiness of Krishna, He brings us this happiness. And He says: “Whom you could be, that You are able to bring me happiness? śrī-rādhāyāḥ praṇaya-mahimā and Her love, pranaya brings happiness to me, that means that She is higher than Me, how can it be? It cannot be.” Krishna thought: “It cannot be, but how it is? I have to figure it out. śrī-rādhāyāḥ praṇaya-mahimā – who is this being who can love so much that Her love makes Me happy.” And after that He thought: svadyam evam madhuri mam idriso vam anya. He started thinking: “I am attached to Her. I am definitely attached to Her. When I see Her or feel smell of Her body, I lose my mind. When the wind blowing near to Her touches me, flute is falling from my hands and dhoti comes in mess and sometimes it even falls down, My hair also messes as all the body starts getting worried. But when She sees Me, She sees something incredible. Because when She sees something which reminds Her about Me even from far, She rushes to embrace to this tamal tree, tamal tree reminds Her Myself even just nearly, She is embracing this tamal tree and says: “I am the happiest woman in the world.” How much She can be attached to Me that something which even nearly reminds Her about me, generates such feelings in Her? And Krishna started thinking: “Maybe She sees in Me something, what I cannot see Myself. Yes, it’s obvious, that I am beautiful.” Who does not think like that standing in front of the mirror? Krishna in view of all the causes thinks like that: “Of course, there is no one more beautiful than Me, but I cannot see what She can.” Because what do we see? Beauty is in the eyes of lover. “The beauty which She sees I cannot see. She is fascinated with something in Me, which I have never felt, because Her love is so strong.” This is second desire: to see this beauty of Krishna with eyes of Radha, to see His beauty with Her eyes, to get this experience of happiness – so khyam, experience of happiness which brings this. 

Did anyone ever love anyone? Please, raise your hands. Of course, it was craziness, temporary insanity. 

There was one theologist in Muslim world, I forgot his name, and he wrote treatise about love, it is called Dove’s Necklace, where he considers love as an illness, he reviews all the symptoms of it. He says: “This is incredible disease, it is the only disease, which nobody wants to be get rid of. This is illness, there is no doubt, this is craziness, madness people can even die of it, but nobody wants to be cured from it.” Krishna says: “Let me become sick of this illness. I want to be ill by this disease, I want to be diseased by Her love.” And here under this tamarind tree, as I already told you He felt some sparkle of love and came here as Caitanya Mahaprabhu to experience this love thoroughly. And I guess Svarupa Damodara Goswami says that: tat bhava gyam samajani – He was born with this bhava, but somehow or other time was needed this bhava to be ripened. One very important thing which we will constantly repeat here is that feelings are ripening. Here Caitanya Mahaprabhu is teaching us that in His example. This is miracle which has to come, has to happen to us but somehow or other on one hand we have to do something for its coming. On the other hand, this miracle does not happen just by one click. This is some process prolonged in time, when feeling becomes deeper, deeper and deeper and every moment when a person feels some feeling, it seems to him that it cannot be deeper any more. But some time passes and it becomes much deeper. 

Love is amazing thing, amazing emotion, amazing experience and it is absolutely bottomless. If a person wants to touch eternity, then he can touch eternity through attaining this experience. Particularly when talk is about spiritual love. Caitanya Mahaprabhu teaches us in His example that this fathomless experience, the experience that this is the very ocean… We can swim over the ocean of material existence, we have to swim over the ocean of material existence for what? In order to come in the ocean which does not have boundaries, this is another ocean. Ocean of material existence has got a shore, I can swim and come on the ground, but ocean of love does not have boundaries. What is the only thing you can do there? You can only be drowned there and never achieve its bottom, you can dive towards bottom but you will never approach it. And this is what Caitanya Mahaprabhu is teaching us. He came and He Himself experienced these feelings, deeper, deeper, deeper, deeper and at the same time He taught us how to make our heart deeper, how to make our spiritual emotions deeper, deeper and deeper. 

And Caitanya Mahaprabhu, we know that He started His career as a logician, as the knower of nyaya, as an undefeated master of nyaya. It is said that he wrote a book about this nyaya which He threw in Ganges in request of His classmate, who was very upset with Him. But He started as disputer. As a person who is adoring intelligence. This is very important. Very often in Krishna Consciousness come people who are granted with intelligence higher than middle level and Krishna Consciousness is fascinating for many people for its philosophy, but if we stay only on the level of head, on the stage of philosophy, we will not understand anything. I have seen such people. They are learning scriptures they like that, they like thinking, reflecting, Bhagavad-gita and everything and in some sense all this intellectual game is fascinating for them and if they do not go deeper, if they do not go farther taking next step, nothing will happen and the next step is called diksa. When a person in the process of nyaya contacts devotees, when he is learning scriptures with others, at some moment he has to give his heart to one person. And when Caitanya Mahaprabhu got diksa in Gaya from Isvara Puri, His heart was changed. Nobody could recognize Him after returning from Gaya. From naiyayika He became bhakta and here is the essence of diksa. Someone thinks that I need diksa for my head to be blown more, I need another mantra, which I will learn. No, diksa is necessary in order to summarize what I have learnt before and then to turn it into experience: yaḥsvānubhāvam akhila-śruti-sāram ekam adhyātma-dīpam atititīrṣatāṁ tamo ’ndham saṁsāriṇāṁ.  Srila Suta Goswami is worshiping Sukadeva Goswami and says: yaḥ svānubhāvam akhila-śruti-sāram ekam. akhila sruti sara eka, when the essence, quintessence of all sruti, akhila sruti sara, ekam – the unified essence turns into experience, then this experience is Srimad-Bhagavatam and Srimad-Bhagavatam is describing love, Srimad-Bhagavatam is describing emotion, Srimad-Bhagavatam is describing what all other sastras have to teach us. 

When we are studying sastras in some moment it all has to settle down when our consciousness is concentrated on a person manifestation of these sruti, essence of these srutis. Caitanya Mahaprabhu manifested that, when He got diksa, he saw Krishna after some time chanting His diksa mantra and Hare Krishna mantra: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. He saw this akhila sruti saran eka – the unified essence of all sastras is God Himself. If I do not move forward, if something is still remaining in me some fragments of some kind of information, some kilobytes downloaded from Wi-Fi in my head, then it still does not mean anything, even that was not enough for Him. He got diksa, it was not enough for Him, He thinks okay, it means, that I have to serve devotees and He started to serve the devotees. We know Vrindavan Dasa Thakura is describing that when Caitanya Mahaprabhu came back from Gaya nobody could recognize Him, because He was manifestation of this mood: trinad api sunicena taror api sahisnuna, this is the next stage. Actually, this is diksa: trinad api sunicena taror api sahisnuna, began serving devotees, began washing linens, He started to carry baskets on His head, started to help others to carry heavy things. But this is too little. He started to sing the Holy Names with them: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. All nights long He was singing kirtans but even it was too little, love was becoming deeper, but He felt that he had not achieved to what He wanted. He felt that something was lacking. Do we sometimes think that we are lacking something? He got sanyasa, He renounced from the world completely, but still something was lacking, even it was not enough. That’s why He came on the river Godavari. When Sarvabhauma Bhattacarya said that there is one big Vaisnava whom I was laughing at, before that he had come here and cried and talked something about Krishna, when I saw him, I laughed at him and said: if you sat here, you would get this vedanta. ” Then I understood, but it was late, but I understood, go to Ramananda Ray.” When Caitanya Mahaprabhu heard that, He understood: “This is what I need.” 

Because to feel bhava truly, we have to listen to one who feels this bhava. It is impossible to do that in other way, to go deeper. Up to some stage it is possible to feel something, with chanting the Holy Names something can be felt, through getting diksa it is possible to feel something, engaging in kirtan something can be felt, but actually it is necessary to hear a person who has direct experience. And this is not me, please, do not think about it. in Brihad Bhagavatamrta Narada Muni is saying very interesting thing to Gop Kumar. Gop Kumar is travelling from one planet to another, Gop Kumar always meets love for Krishna and everywhere something is lacking for him. Everywhere he feels that something is not okay, something is lacking. Everything is good, everything is beautiful, everything is nice, everything is wonderful, still something is lacking. What is lacking? He met Narada Muni and he said to him: “ This is love which is lacking to you. You are lacking love.” And Narada Muni is singing kirtan with him: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare.” Narada Muni is saying: “You won’t get anything out of it, to get what you want, to obtain what you want, you must hear how Srimati Radharani is explaining that. For this purpose go there and hear it. Or if God Himself comes and distributes love towards Him, it becomes possible to obtain love of God.” 

There are two sources for obtaining this love: one is words of Srimati Radharani Herself, the other is when Krishna comes in Her mood, when He puts it in His devotees. We will talk a little bit later about to whom, through whom He did it, who became His voice. We were supposed to go from here to Radha Damodara temple, to samadhi of Rupa Goswami, but as some repair is in process there, we have to stay here and if you are not tired, talk about how Caitanya Mahaprabhu talks to us through Rupa Goswami and gives us through Him what He wants and His desire is. But Narada Muni says that can be obtained only like that, only in this way, there is no other means, you can get this in no other way and then here comes one legitimate question “How to get it?” If we understand that, if we need that… Who does not want it, there is no problem, you can just stand up and go. But you can never feel peace anywhere until you experience that. And in the same Brihad Bhagavatamrita there is another episode where Narada Muni is explaining what we have to do. Because there is something which we cannot understand, which has to come, which has to happen with us. But what do we have to do? And Narada Muni is explaining what we have to do and this is the most important thing which I wanted to say, I will say later some important things, but to set this mood or purpose of our parikrama I would like to say from the very beginning, what is necessary from our side, how we can catch some ray of this love by the mirror of our consciousness, what we have to do. Sanatana Goswami is explaining that through the lips of Narada Muni, he says that what we have to do in the beginning, that is to attain dainya–bhava or this mood that I by myself will not go anywhere. 

And he says that this is a mood which has to come to a very qualified people. It is not about natural ineligibility, there are people naturally ineligible and if such person thinks: “I am not eligible in anything,” it is not still dainya-bhava. If a person has talents of virtue, purity and all the other things in his heart, but besides that he has this adhama-buddhi, the feeling that I am very fallen – adhama-buddhi and that I cannot do anything on my own, I am not illegible of anything, I am not judge and if I have this dainya-bhava this dainya-bhava opens heart for experience of love to enter there. Experience of love is impossible to get if there is not this dainya-bhava and Narada Muni is explaining this moment. Please, listen very carefully. He is saying what it means. He says that vidvan, people who are truly in knowledge understanding that this is some kind of gate, gate to the kingdom of spiritual emotions. In the kingdom of spiritual emotions it is impossible to get through any other door, there is only door which is leading there and those people, intelligent people – vidvan – know that there is no other gate, there is no other door, even it is not gate, this is a narrow door, low door, where we have to go through bending. What are they doing? Yaya vaca hitam dainyam matyam ca stharyam eti tat – they are trying stharyam – do that in three things they reinforce their dainya, in order it to feed three things: vaca – their words, for in their words they would express their humility or dinatva, their fallen condition. Ihitam means in their actions. In my actions I have to try to be humble, I must not go in front of anyone, I have to be somewhere in the back, and as far as better and it is ihitam. matyam is the most difficult thing. A person can be humble with his words, can be humble with his actions, but with his thoughts: “What a humble I am. I am the humblest, look at me.” – matyam. stharyam means achieving stability in that. What it means, that as soon as something is manifesting to us something opposite to that, I have to shorten myself because the habit is too difficult, the major thing is that thoughts will habitually walk on the same passed cycle: “I am the best. I am the purest. I am the best. All others what are they doing?” 

As one great French philosopher – as is expected from great French philosophers – once said that the very fact of existence of someone else, that’s already a scandal. It’s a scandal that someone dares to exist. This is already outrageous. We do not have any chance to achieve this high stage of big French philosopher, but sometimes we follow his footsteps, and sometimes we think: “How dare they? What are they thinking? You are existing, okay, God bless you, but you have to know your place.” That’s why Sanatana Goswami says this very important thing, he is continuing this description, he says, that there is humility which is in our power, he says that intelligent people, people who are truly learnt always watch their thoughts, always watch their words, always watch their actions and they manage to throw away all the opposite things, everything which vivarjaet – they deny, drive away, they renounce from everything which impacts them and hinders them to be established in it. And further he says that, at last this dainya turns into love. He says: “Look at the cowherds girls of Vrindavan who were abandoned by Krishna here, in Vrindavan, there was nobody in the world humbler than them.” And he says, listen very carefully, that humbleness, dainya and prema they are cause and effect of each other. Humility gives birth to love, love gives birth to humility, humility gives birth even deeper love, and this deeper love gives birth and deeper humility, which gives birth even deeper love and thus incessantly… There is no end of this, spiritual life has no end. This experience can be deepened eternally, but they are linked together as karya and karana. One is karya, but this karya is in its turn karana as well which is karya, which is karana and so on. Or it is cause and result simultaneously. 

And further in Brihad-Bhagavatamrita there is wonderful thing and this is the most important, the most important thing from the most important things which I want to tell you today, because we came here for this experience. This experience can make us happy, we came here for happiness let us be honest, we are trying to achieve it, and happiness in that form it is special and we have to know the recipe how to delve into it and there, in Brihad-Bhagavatamrita Uddhava is saying marvelous thing, Uddhava meets Gop Kumar and Gop Kumar is about to go to Purusottama Ksetra, Jagannatha Puri and Uddhava is saying: “Why are you going in Jagannath Puri? Also here, in Dvarak Purushottam Dev is residing here and he is there in immovable condition in the form of Devakinandana if you go there, in Jagannatha Puri, you will have lots of prasadthere.” Has anyone been in Jagannath Puri? Raise your hands please. He says: “There in Jagannatha Puri everything will be fantastic. There will be lots of prasad, there will be constant festivals, there everything will be just amazing.” But what will be lacking there? Humility will not be there. Listen very carefully, because he is continuing: “In this suite of festivity, in all these happenings, festivals, prasad you might unfortunately forget about the most important, about humility.” 

Does it remember you anything? Sunday program, kirtan, prasad, one more festival, one more festival, one more festival, one more festival, one more festival… and lots of prasad. He says: “You will forget there about humility and moreover if you go in Purusottama Ksetra, Purusottam Dev, Jagannath will send you here, to Mathura: “Go to Mathura, Go to Vrindavan.” And you will be seeking Krishna there and you will not find Him.” Does it remind you anyone? Go to Vrindavan and you will see Yamuna there and you will be thinking: “Definitely on the banks of Yamuna I will meet Krishna.” But He is not there, then you will be thinking: “He is definitely on Govardhan.” But again, He is not there and then you will run to Vamsivata and He is not there as well. At this moment what will you feel? – Humility. At this moment you will feel dainya: “Who am I at after all?” Krishna is here and I cannot see Him, Krishna is here and I am the same idiot as I used to be before.” In this moment Uddhava says: ”You will feel humility and when you feel humility, you will be able to come back in spiritual world.” 

This is very interesting. Uddhava is saying to Gop Kumara: You will never become happy until you return to Goloka, you will never be able to feel what you need, all time you will be lacking something, but unfortunately your love what you have already is not enough for achieving Goloka, because to come to Goloka you have to transform your consciousness, you have to transform your heart, you have to feel something. In order to feel love, you have to deepen your heart with humility, humility makes heart deeper. When heart is shallow then pride is manifested in all possible forms. Humility makes your heart deeper. Where can you obtain humility? If you walk in Vrindavan, and remember what was happening here on the different places of Vrindavan and you think how it was there, what kind of love was in there and anyway you will not see Krishna, you will not experience separation. Caitanya Mahaprabhu is teaching us one very important moment, He is saying clearly: trinad api sunichena taror api sahisnuna amanina manadena kirtanya sada harih, but He is also saying that in order to learn true love, we have to learn love in separation, that namely love in separation is giving us true experience and He Himself being here is experiencing love in separation with Krishna. And who can answer this question: why Caitanya Mahaprabhu did not stay in Vrindavan? Nobody has thought about it. Why He despite Uddhava’s advice went to Jagannatha Puri? Because here everything remembered Him, that He is Krishna Himself, and that was hampering Him to feel, to experience this radha-bhava, to experience mood of Srimati Radharani.

We have still left half an hour and I want to say a few more things, are you ready? “Yes!” (sounds from audience). Some people are saying and please listen, this is very important for us also there are people for whom it is not very important, why? Because it is sanga-siddha-bhakti. Sanga-siddha-bhakti is not svarupa-siddha-bhakti. Svarupa-siddha-bhakti is when we are giving all our heart to hearing, chanting Holy Names and then all the remarkable characters will manifest in us in itself. Yasyasti bhaktir bhagavaty akincana… There in the 13th chapter of Bhagavad-gita it is quoted: amanitvam adambhitvam… In the beginning you have to become humble, but it is explained that this is sanga-siddha–bhakti as Visvanatha Cakravarti Thakura is commenting in this verse. So Sanatana Goswami is saying different thing. He says that humility is synonym of love, love is impossible without humility, humility is impossible without love and it is proportional to that how much love we have, we are capable to experience love. No samskara will remain in our heart if it is hard. This is not sanga-siddha-bhakti, this is svarupa-siddha-bhakti but it is true in relation with this quality, because it is not different from love itself and the essence is that, if we do not have humility, we never even coming in Vrindavan, will be able to feel separation from Krishna. 

What is the experience of separation from Krishna? We stopped here. And under separation from Krishna this is understanding of that I am so fallen that I cannot see Krishna, His lilas are still going on here and the devotees can see them still, He comes, He comes to everyone, but He for some reason is not coming to me. Particularly here in Vrindavan where everything is reminding about His very existence here, Yamuna, temples, where great devotees who left here symptoms of their meeting with Krishna, we can understand to what degree we are fallen, here in Vrindavan going around from place to place we can feel in such a level our heart is dead. In Moscow it is difficult to feel that because there everybody is like that and moreover I am better than others, I am purer, I do not eat meat and here all these virtue becomes nothing, they do not appear, and it is very important for us to come to the condition of material nil because now we are not material nil but minus ten I do not know on which grade. I do not know in what stage we are, big number with minus mark. We are trying to blow up our existence in the material world and give ourselves importance in material sense and to get something in spiritual world we have to become nil at the beginning. We have to become nobody and it is the easiest thing to become nobody in Vrindavan, because in Vrindavan you are nobody, in other places we might be still imagining ourselves something: “I am this, I am that,” – now here all these things are absolutely not important, you came here, leave everything at the gates and even if you are brahmacari, forget about it. It is difficult, I understand, but it is possible, more difficult is to forget that you are a mataji, this is completely difficult, but even it is possible in Vrindavan. In Vrindavan we are nobody, we are servants of the dust of Vrindavan, we are servants of the dust. 

In Vrindavan we have to try to pray to everything and then we will be able to feel separation from Krishna. “How unfortunate I am. Caitanya Mahaprabhu was here just 500 years ago. It was pretty possible for me to be there also. Srila Prabhupada was here just 30-40 years ago, 50 years ago.” Any of you lived? We might be touching him and feel his bhava, but we lost this opportunity. How many great devotees were there, how many devotees are now there who we do not know, who we do not appreciating, whom we do not understand. Our imagination about our greatness hides everything from us. And when a person is feeling separation, this is for what purpose came here Caitanya Mahaprabhu. Everything for what He came comes to us through this feeling of separation. 

In Padyavali Rupa Goswami is taking one astounding verse; he is saying in this verse: “When I meet Krishna, Krishna is only one, and in separation all three words are full of Krishna for me.” In separation a person can feel Krishna much deeper because everything reminds him about that he does not have Krishna and that feeling can be experienced only when a person has true humility, not an artificial humility and this is the thing which we can practice. This is the thing for what we came here and if a person does that His heart will be enlightened and then the imprints will stay with him. Because what happens now? Srila Sanatana Goswami is not saying that in vain, that everything else, everything what is resisting humility has to be thrown away. And now I will say the most important from the most important, from the most important things what I wanted to say. 

The most important is humility, humility is helping us to develop love of God and there is no other means, and the deeper our humility is the deeper our love is. If you do not have love, it means that you do not have humility and everyone who does not have humility, please, raise your hands and loudly say Haribol. Haribol sounds from the audience. It had to be illustrated. 

We came here to confess about our complete bankruptcy and from this moment something can start, this is the very mood in which we can and must learn to chant Holy Names: I am nobody, but despite that Krishna wants to come to me. And we can address Him personally through the sound of Holy Names, but only in the case if I am nobody inside: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. Krishna cannot be understood if being in this material body we identify ourselves with material body. It is impossible to chant the Holy Names if we are in material body. If you think, that you’d better commit suicide, then in the body of ghost it is also impossible to chant Holy Names. Holy Names can be chanted only in the spiritual body. And for that we have to stop being material body and mind: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare and feel how Holy Names comes down to us, it is here, it is in the air, it is here, Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu left it here for us. We just have to throw away all the other things and here I want to say the most important thing from the most important things which I wanted to say: we have to practice humility, and humility is not different from love, it is nothing else but love. Sanatana Goswami says, that only here, in Bhauma Vrindavan we can practice humility. God forbid it, that you go to heavenly planets, God forbid it! it’s completely terrific. You will stay there for long time with apsaras… Hare Krishna! Actually, I am talking not very persuasively. Maybe it does not seem so bad. The essence is that, Uddhava said: “You will not know peace nowhere until you come here to Vrindavan, if you do not experience this humility. And you will not be able to experience this taste and to improve your love in such a level, that it could uplift you to the summit. 

And here this possibility exists, as Sanatana Goswami says Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu left this place because He came here for giving that to everyone else without any discrimination, if He discriminated we would not be here definitely, we would not go through the sieve, even if… but there is not such a sieve through which our false ego can ooze. There is nothing like that, nobody has invented that yet. Our false ego would keep us in this world, that is why Caitanya Mahaprabhu is saying to you, there is no problem, He will not even struggle because it is ungrateful effort. Come here anyone, there is always access, I will send you Srila Prabhupada and he will do everything for you. But very important thing I’d like to say, that is why I thought that the next part of our parikrama we would spend near Srila Rupa Goswami’s samadhi. 

Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu empowered Rupa Goswami and made him his voice. And he explained, Rupa Goswami explained how to get this experience. There had been many great devotees before Rupa Goswami, there had been many great devotees before Caitanya Mahaprabhu: Bilvamangala Thakura, Jayadev Goswami, Candi das, Vidyapati, they all had this experience of love. Many great devotees were rolling on the ground, crying, but nobody explained how could this love be achieved. This particular love, not something different. Recently one person to whom appeared very strong doubts about practice of Krishna Consciousness, who had not get this experience, the emotional experience of this involvement, he thought, that Christians do not get any experience, but they get without doubt, everyone gets some experience, of course they get this love, but what kind of love? Not the kind of love which Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu is talking about, not that love about which he inaugurated Srila Rupa Goswami to speak about. Not that one. Definitely they get, with awe, with respect they are achieving something, they get their experience, great experience, we are nobody, we are lower than the dust here and we cannot judge what kind of love they are getting. Everyone gets, but we want get what Caitanya Mahaprabhu brought to us. And we have to understand, how Srila Rupa Goswami discloses that to us. 

In Bhakti-rasamrita-sindhu he explains to us how to get this experience of love. I wanted to say few words about it. He says one very important thing, very important thing, today I started my talk with that. How we started our talk today? With samskaras. I started with samskaras, is it right? Look how many people are gathered here? And now we just were singing kirtan and everyone was singing the same thing, isn’t it? Has everyone experienced the same or not? Everyone experienced it differently, is it right? Why? Because of different samskaras. Experience which a person is getting, depends on our samskaras. And Srila Rupa Goswami says, that a person can get experience of love only when… one person sees peacock feather and faints. Murari Gupta was a royal healer at the court of Hussain Shah and when he saw a fan of peacock feather, he fainted. He was asked: “What happened to you?” He was confused and said I have epilepsy and sometimes I have such attacks. And Hussain Shah looked at him and said: “We know this epilepsy.” Another person said: when I see peacock feathers I am vomiting, Charles Darwin said that, because peacock feathers could not fit into his theory of evolution. He could not explain in no way, which virtues had been given to peacocks with this terrible peacock feathers. Why they were not still eaten? That’s it, One is vomiting, another is fainting out of love. Why? Because Charles Darwin has one sort of samskaras and Murari Gupta has another samskaras. We are reacting to the world, we are watching the world through the prism of samskaras, through the prism of our past experience. 

And Srila Rupa Goswami says wonderful thing, he says that when samskara becomes very deep when samskaras literally penetrate – spiritual samskaras, in the given case the talk is about spiritual samskaras not about anything else – then a person is experiencing bhava. And the word bhava is very important we will return to the previous topic, do not think that for us it is not timely. This is timely, because bhava is our goal. The word bhava is coming from the first Sanskrit root. There are lists of roots of Sanskrit verbs with their explanations, first root which is explained from these lists, this is root bhu which means ‘to be’ or ‘to become’. Bhava is literally something which facilitates generating of something. And another meaning of the word bhava is ‘something what pervades completely all existence and that helps us to manifest something’. So, listen very carefully, because at the beginning I wanted to explain what is bhava and how it is different from rasa. 

Bhava is the thing that helps manifestation of rasa, or gives a person the highest experience of love. Bhava in some sense is mood. Principally it is very easy to understand. You all know what joyful mood is. You are in joyful mood, joyful mood means, that you have joyful mood, and if you have joyful mood, somebody is saying something joyful or funny and even not very especially funny, but you are starting laughing, is it right? This is rasa. Hasya-rasa means when something is stimulating in me manifestation of particular bhava and it manifests in such a way that I am laughing, I am laughing until the tears and I know very well, that people have different moods and these people if you say some joke, he is laughing and another is just looking around. Why? Because there is no bhava as there is no bhava, there is no rasa as well. These are material examples, now I am talking about material rasa as Bharata Muni described it. Where he says that in the beginning there should be bhava, some kind of mood, then when this mood contacts smth that increases it – vibhava, anubhava, vyabhicari bhava –when all these three things vibhava, anubhava – that which manifest this mood and which moves this mood, improves this mood – then rasa comes. When there are these three things, but in the beginning should come sthayi-bhava, some stable mood, which is defined with very deep samskaras, as Rupa Goswami says, this is where appears this bhava from. 

Again, please listen about what is bhava. Bhava is some kind of mood which pervades all of us. Again, let us take some material example. Are you sometimes sad? And when you are sad, is whole your body sad, is it right? Sadness is not only in the mind, isn’t it? Sadness appears in the mind because of some things which make it manifested, but sadness is distributed in the whole body and you are feeling particular condition some kind of condition which you have, according level of energy. You want to sing some kind of songs and something more. This sadness can turn into rasa, into karuna rasa, because sadness is some original bhava which is precedes rasa. Do you understand how rasa is different from bhava? Bhava is some kind of preliminary general mood which is based on very deep samskaras. These samskaras have to become very deep. So everything which precedes in the stage of bhava, all the practice which we are doing it is completely aimed to make these samskaras appear in us. These samskaras are starting to manifest at which moment? These samskaras are starting to manifest in the moment when ananya-buddhi appears to a person, when his consciousness completely concentrates on Krishna. Srila Rupa Goswami is explaining very precisely this mechanism. Listen carefully, because we have to understand what lays in the basis of this experience. 

He says that for bhava to appear, for samskaras to flood our consciousness, first of all this ananya buddhi, intelligence has to appear, it has to be completely concentrated. Then he is explaining interesting thing, that experience of bhava in some sense it is regulated with intelligence. To some degree a person realizes this mood. Just like when we have some mood we realize it if we observe it little bit from aside. But when bhava turns into rasa a person cannot observe from aside anymore, is it right? When you are giggling you cannot observe from aside, you are in there completely. It fills you up completely. There is no place for buddhi, buddhi is ability to observe from a bit aside, evaluating what is happening. On the stage of bhava a person has this capability, he understands, he realizes his consciousness. On the stage of rasa he cannot realize anything, he is rolling on the ground, he is crying, he is singing, he is completely in love. Hopefully we will ever find yourself there. At the beginning you have to come to the level of bhava. On the stage of bhava a person comes, when ananya buddhi appears to him. At which stage appears to him this ananya buddhi? This samskaras and some moments that remind us about Krishna need to become deeper, in order to awaken that in us. We know many stories, we are listening something but our heart is silent, why? Because there is no samskara. Because there is no such experience. How to get this experience. For that we have to fix our intelligence and intelligence becomes fixed in which stage on the stage of nistha, on the stage of nistha.

All our spiritual life is divided into several stages starting with sraddha, when we are getting a little taste. What is faith? Faith is when we get atom of the taste, atom of spiritual taste. We got faith that means, that we got faith in the personality of God, that God exists, that He is protecting us, that He is always with us and with it we got drop, little atom of taste. Who got this atom of taste, to whom appeared this taste? Something what we had not felt before that, something which made us mad, what made us do lots of stupid things, jump from the balcony, to divorce your wife, or on the contrary marry her, lots of stupid things we have done in our life as a devotees and that’s why we are called sectarians, but it is normal, it is okay. Because if not sect then what? If not sect that means nothing. Sect means that we believe, because when we believe this is sect and when we do not believe that is not a sect. It is not very scientific definition of sect of mine, but it is based on experience. In reality how people are different. They are different of which faith they have. And faith means taste. 

A person got this experience of faith with little taste. It made him go forward. But until the stage of nistha he still looks around, he still thinks maybe there, or maybe there, or there. He looks and sees something is charming him. Maybe chocolate will make me happy. And because experience of spiritual happiness is little, material happiness sometimes prevails a person and he is thinking… experience of material happiness it is very strong , that’s why we definitely need association after we got faith, we need association with a person whose experience of spiritual happiness is stronger than experience of material happiness. If we do not see before us this person, we will be blown away anyway. We have to fix on this concrete person, we have to get this experience in his association. This wi-fi as Thakura Haridasa explained it in modern language… Wi-fi is understood by everyone. We have to understand that just we must have access, the password. A person gets this password as a mantra, at the moment of initiation, this is the password of wi-fi, this is opportunity to connect with this bhava, a person starts to serve, a person starts to do something, but anyway there is no ananya-buddhi isn’t it? There are other things which are resisting. There are some other interests and the major thing there is hope that exists another way of our happiness. Do we have this hope? Yes, it’s here. And when there is such hope, there cannot be ananya-buddhi. 

That is why a person has to go further and in result of that he is trying to chant the Holy Names and at the same time he is listening, he is always listening and he is told neither this, nor that, and he tastes another things and says: “Okay, truly it is not that, but maybe this is the one.” He is again trying and saying: No, this is not the one as well. But if he stops listening he will think: “Maybe that.” He tries it again, again and again, but if a person is hearing, he goes further and he comes to the stage when he touches internally this desire and says: “No this is not that one. It is not that.” He is literally saying: “No, I do not want. I do not need it, I do not need it.” It is called anartha-nivritti. When one after another material desires start to die only because we do not water them. Material samskaras start to go only because of the lack of our attention. If you do not water a flower, what will happen with a flower? The flower will be dried. We have here many of such flowers. We have there complete bouquets blossoming here. A person stops to water them: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare… Some kind of emotion comes and he says: “This is not that. I do not need it.” He raises his hands and says: Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. But it happens only if he is hearing. 

Bhajana-kriya means that I am constantly hearing. Sadhu-sanga means, that I listen sometimes, while bhajana-kriyameans, that I listen constantly. I am listening to Srila Prabhupada who says: “This is not that, this is not that, this is not that. This is that, this is what you need.” And then comes anartha-nivritti, in some moment a person achieves stage of nistha and nistha means, that I do not look anywhere anymore. And God bless us to achieve this moment one day. And a person achieves true samskara, how he achieves samskara? Because his consciousness is sufficiently purified. And when he is listening, this samskara leaves deep trace when he does not forget what he heard. Now as our consciousness is full of other things, we are listening to something and yes, some trace is left there but there are other things as well and we return and what we are thinking about? What we were thinking about before. Someone offended me 20 years ago, let us pounder about it. A deep samskara lays there, we remember about it. This is moment of nistha when we are purifying our consciousness, when there is nothing, at this moment we are opening our heart. At this moment the heart is opening for the traces to be left there deeper. And when these first deep traces are appearing what we are starting to feel? – Ruci. 

He hears the Holy Names, everything cheers him up. He remembers everything what is connected with the Holy Names. So many things connect him with the Holy names, how many emotions. When they are enlivening in heart, immediately lots of things begin to remind him about it. He is looking at Krishna’s picture, he is listening something… And then comes taste. At the beginning this taste is weak, but then it becomes stronger, becomes attachment and at last the attachment is increased in bhava. Bhava is when samskara becomes so strong that emotion pervades us completely. We become completely consisted of love of Krishna. Everything we see, each experience that we feel is digested and digested and turns into love and then at some moment it turns into rasa. At some moment we forget about ourselves and it is called prema. 

This is the path which is explained by Srila Rupa Goswami. We are going on this path in order to get rid of unnecessary samskaras step by step and to get rid of unnecessary samskaras through humility. Our pride is manifested as grudge. I was offended, who was offended? Our false ego was offended. False ego is in pain till now. We were pinched once upon a time. Recently one devotee wrote to me about the fact, that when he was four years old his parents offended him and he cannot still forgive them. Since four years he is remembering that fact. He says: “I do not have association with them since that, I do not want to have something in common with them.” Why? – Pride, painful false ego. For that purpose we have to become humble to purify our heart where step by step spiritual samskaras will accumulate. 

Now we also have them, we have spiritual experience. Does anyone have spiritual experience even any kind of it? Yes, there is some kind of spiritual experience, but it is not enough to overweigh just simple material experience. And Srila Rupa describes this path, Caitanya Mahaprabhu put in his heart, gave him opportunity to do this but further after that… This is the very beginning. Prema is just the beginning of everything, the most important things begin after that, before that everything is I do not know what, it is unclear what it is. The movie is starting after that, before it there were just adverts only, some kind of trailers only. The movie starts after that, the most interesting thing starts when we achieve that. And Srila Rupa Goswami writes one book after another for what? For us to be able to appreciate this in some level. 

Bhakti-rasamrta-sindhu where he starts with sadhana but then he is explaining us this experience, when a person is achieving the stage of bhava, after that comes prema and he is explaining how this rasa comes, nobody else could explain that. Nobody else could understand what bhakti-rasa is. Srila Bharata Muni does not say anything about bhakti-rasa and others are thinking, that bhakti is also emotion, we have to introduce it in this system, and Rupa Goswami is saying everything about which Bharata Muni is talking is only about bhakti-rasa, everything is bhakti-rasa. How to get it? How is it going? How is it manifesting? Afterwards he is describing that, afterwards he writes complete work Ujjvala Nilamani, where he is describing how from 33 vyabhicari-bhava or sancari-bhava – intricate manifestations of emotions which are changing each other, enriching love – and they are manifested at the stage of madhura-rati when a person achieved sringara-rasa and for each of them he is giving examples – 33 emotions, 5 rasas. Bhakti-rasamrita-sindhu and Ujjvala Nilamani on each of them he takes examples how much it comes out? … 13 anubhavas. How different anubhavas are manifested, how this love is manifesting outwardly. Sattvika-bhava in different stages of manifestation. He tells us all that so that we could experience all these emotions, understand them and to some degree, at least appreciate them. 

And Krishnadas Kaviraja Goswami wrote Caitanya-caritamrita for explaining all that in simple language. And in Caitanya-caritamrita he writes wonderful thing, he says: “When I talk about love between Krishna and gopis, I am scared, because I am thinking about this demoniac people who will read this and laugh at it or flout all that and I am scared because of it and at the same moment I understand, that anyway, they will not understand anything and as they will understand nothing so I can write about it. They will not get any experience anyway, that is why I can speak about it openly.” For whom he is speaking? For those who want to get this and he says that we have to think about it, we have to listen about it. But how this should be done, this must be done with humility, this is not a reason to be proud. 

This is just an indication that we are still in underground cellar, in the cellar of material world. In this dungeon of material world, with some kind of material emotions. At least in order to manifest this desire in our heart of achieving the stage of nistha. When I, with great humility completely concentrated, there is nothing else interesting for me. There is no samskara. On the stage of anartha-nivrtti all the other samskaras fell apart and that’s why nothing else awakens my interest in me. And due to the association with devotees somehow or other spiritual samskara  came to us, and something makes us happy and that is why a person achieves ananya-buddhi. On this stage this path can be started, and when these samskaras on the stage of nistha on the stage of ananya-buddhi are very deep, this bhava pervades all his existence, a person will be consisted of vatsalya-bhava, or sakhya-bhava, or madhurya-bhava. And it becomes apparent.

I know one lady, I will not say her name, she is manifestation… or if anyone wants to see how bhava pervades everything, you have to look at her. Such people there are many of them actually if we look around. This is path which Srila Rupa Goswami wrote about,  by Caitanya Mahaprabhu’s mercy we can walk on this path. Here Krishna experienced radha-bhava. He came as Caitanya Mahaprabhu to deepen it and he listened to Ramananda Roy. Everything what Ramananda Roy narrated, Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu retold all these things to Rupa Goswami in Prayag. He says it Himself: “I am telling you what I was narrated by Ramananda Roy, through parampara.” When he narrated about this bhava or about these emotions. Rupa Goswami described this path, which ultimately leads us there. And we are here to go on this path, or at least to make some steps on this path. But for the beginning we have to know that our central point is: trinad api sunicena taror api sahisnuna amanina manadena kirtanyah sada harih. This is bhava which we even do not have now, but we are constantly longing for it, for achieving it, we have to chant the Holy Names as if we had it. 

So, this is my narration, I wanted to tell you much more, but anyway we will have more opportunity to talk about it further. This is what I wanted to tell you today here in Imlital under this tree. If you have free time, please, do come here, the tree is here, bhava is here, great devotees are here, Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu is here, Krishna is here, everything is here, but we are not here, this place is lacking only us. And if we come in right mood here, something can be opened to us. 

Thank you very much!